


A High Risk Premium

by yarnandtea



Series: Despite the Odds [4]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: AU, F/M, Mass Effect 1, Shenko - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-06
Updated: 2013-09-06
Packaged: 2017-12-25 18:41:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/956419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yarnandtea/pseuds/yarnandtea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Winnie is confronted with an unwelcome reminder of her past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A High Risk Premium

**Author's Note:**

> For anyone that has played the Earthborn origin for Shepard, I am sure you will notice a few discrepancies in Winnie's run-in with Finch. Bear in mind that in this AU, she was never actually knowingly part of the Reds. So things will shake out just slightly differently.
> 
> As always, thanks to my amazing beta, ladyamesindy!!

 

 

Conrad Verner. Winnie sighed and shook her head as she watched him leave. Hopefully, she’d managed to give him something to think about. She was sure there were lots of training officers who would love a recruit with Verner’s kind of enthusiasm, but Winnie thought he was just a little _too_ eager to go chasing adventures. He wanted the glory without putting in the years of work and training that helped soldiers survive getting it. His heart was in the right place, she thought, but without the training to back it up, he was just going to get himself killed. Maybe back on Earth, he would find the chance he was looking for, though. Everyone had to start somewhere, after all.

“Keelah, Shepard. You have a fan!”

Winnie heaved a sigh and screwed her eyes shut. She could feel the headache starting already.

“Didn’t you know, Tali? The commander is a hero, known throughout the Alliance as a shining example of humanity.”

Alenko laughed warmly and Winnie turned around to glare at him. He did _not_ need to be finding this so amusing.

“ _Really_?” Tali’s voice was brimming with curiosity.

“Oh yeah,” Alenko continued. Catching Winnie’s look, he grinned widely. “You’ve heard of the Skyllian Blitz, right?” At Tali’s nod, he waved at Winnie. “Commander Shepard is called the Hero of the Blitz. Saved the colony of Elysium by holding off the batarian raiders until reinforcements could get there. She’s been the Alliance’s poster child ever since. You can’t walk into a recruitment office without seeing her picture.”

Winnie resisted the urge to stick her tongue out at Alenko. She was a spectre. Spectres did not stick their tongues out at subordinate officers, she was pretty sure. Of course, she was also pretty sure that spectres didn’t blush when said subordinate officers recounted tales of their daring. But she could definitely feel the heat spreading across her face.

“Trust me, Alenko, _none_ of that was my idea.”

“Didn’t think it had been, ma’am,” he said, respectful manner returning instantly. “You don’t really seem like the type who enjoys that sort of attention. But the brass does like to have its heroes to show off. They’ve always been fond of the pageantry.”

“Yeah. They have,” she sighed. “Come on,” she turned for the stairs down to the market, leading them back on the errand they’d been running when Conrad had called them over. “We need to finish buying these supplies so we can get back to the ship and head to Noveria.”

Tali and Alenko fell in behind her without argument. The reminder of their upcoming mission had a sobering effect on the group. She had put it off as long as she felt she could, wanting to give the crew time to get used to fighting together. Thankfully, Admiral Hackett had somehow sensed this need, showing up out of the blue with a myriad of missions that were important enough to require her attention, but small enough that she could use them to get a sense of her new crew and give the _Normandy_ the shakedown cruise it deserved. Idly, she wondered if Anderson had anything to do with that. It did seem awfully damned convenient, Hackett coming to her as he had. Still, she was grateful, because the extra time had paid off. Now, they were ready to start figuring out why the geth were poking around on Noveria. All that was left was to make sure they were full up on supplies before moving out. There was no telling what they might find on Noveria, or where that information would send them next. She wanted to be prepared for whatever might come up.

“So,” Tali said conversationally as they strode down a long, mostly empty corridor. “Does that kind of thing happen often? The, um, admirers?”

“You have no idea,” Winnie sighed. “Fans, reporters, people who think they could have done a better job and want to tell me how in excruciating detail.” She sighed and shot Tali a wry smile. “Makes it hard to take a vacation, let me tell you.”

“Must get wearying,” Alenko said softly. She turned and offered him a smile as well, shrugging.

“Sure, but like you said, the brass needs its heroes. I just happen to be the unlucky show horse this generation, I guess. I mean, what can I do? Stop doing my job?” She shook her head. “Not gonna happen. At least they haven’t been stupid enough to pull me off active duty. It’s not so bad when I’m on the job. Sometimes,” she added softly, “I can almost forget about this hero nonsense.”

“And then you go and do something silly like get yourself named the first human spectre,” Alenko said dryly.

“I can admit, there are days when I wonder if I’m cursed,” she admitted with a short laugh.

“Just be careful,” Tali said in a mock-warning tone. “If we actually manage to stop Saren and the geth, they might just decide to make you the first human Councilor as well.”

Winnie started to gasp in horror at _that_ prospect, but the air got caught in her throat, turning into a choking sort of cough. She bent over with her hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath. Alenko muttered a surprised curse and raced forward to pound her on the back, which nearly knocked her over. Tali seemed torn between trying to apologize and trying not to fall over herself, she was laughing so hard. Winnie couldn’t blame her. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she just kept shaking her head, trying to fend off Alenko’s attempts to help. Finally, she could breathe again, and she stood up, wiping her face.

“Fine, I’m fine,” she managed to stammer.

Alenko still had a hand on her back and he reached for her arm, steering her out of the main walkway. His brow was furrowed in concern as she tried to reassure him that all was well. She also tried very hard not to notice just how close he was standing, or how _warm_ he was (was that the biotics?), or just how nice it felt when he unconsciously started rubbing soothing circles on her back. _So not the time for this Shep_ , she admonished herself. Finally, she composed herself again and Alenko seemed satisfied that she really was okay. Tali tried to apologize again, but Winnie just waved it off. Hadn’t been her fault, after all. Not really. They were almost at the market, and Winnie got them moving again. She was ready to get this supply run over and head back into space. They turned the corner to cut down the corridor that led past Chora’s Den when a new challenge presented itself.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Beall’s little brat, all grown up. You clean up well, Shepard.”

Winnie froze in place and all of the warmth drained from her body. She felt as if she had just fallen into a pool of ice water. Slowly, she turned her head to the source of the voice. A man not much older than her, but who had definitely seen harder days, she thought, leaned nonchalantly against the wall of the corridor. He looked vaguely familiar, but she couldn’t place him. Alarm bells started going off in her head when he pushed off the wall and sauntered over. _Beall. He said Beall. He knows Beall. Who the fuck is this guy?_

“Do I know you?” She put as much of her command tone into her voice as she could. Alenko had gone tense behind her, and she could see that Tali was on the alert as well. Whatever this guy wanted, she had to remember that she was not alone.

Whether or not that was a _good_ thing remained to be seen.

“Guess I shouldn’t have expected you to recognize me. Beall liked to keep you away from the rest of us street rats. I always figured he thought that if he brought you around, the Reds would decide they didn’t need to go through him to get to you anymore.” There was a hint of question in his voice, as if he was hoping she’d confirm the suspicion. “I’m Finch,” he added after a moment, finally deigning to answer her question. “Need you to do something for me,” he smirked.

“What in the hell makes you think I would do anything for you?” Winnie demanded. She had to remind herself to breathe regularly. This could _not_ be happening. Maybe the universe really _did_ hate her.

“Once a Red, always a Red,” Finch quipped. “You owe us, Shepard.”

“I _never_ ran with the Reds! I don’t owe you _anything_ , except maybe an escort to the nearest prison.”

“The Reds?” Alenko said in confusion, looking between Winnie and Finch. “The _Tenth Street Reds_?” He stared at Winnie as if she had grown a second head.

“Who are—” Tali started to ask, but Finch cut her off.

“You lie to yourself all you want, Shepard, but any dirty work you did for Beall was for the Reds.” He glanced over at Alenko, smirking again when he caught the lieutenant’s poleaxed expression. “What, she never told you? Didn’t know your precious Commander Shepard used to be a criminal?”

“Shut up!” Finally able to move again, Winnie lunged at Finch, slamming him into the wall.

“Ooh, feisty!” Finch grinned down at her. She resisted the urge to spit in his face. “No wonder Beall wanted to keep you to himself.”

“If you knew Beall, then you know what happened to him,” Winnie said through clinched teeth. “You know who turned him in, and what that did to the Reds. So I’ll ask again. Why the fuck do you think I would do _any_ thing to help you?”

“Because most of the Reds would love to have your pretty little head on a platter, Shepard,” he said, infuriating grin still plastered across his face. He spread his hands wide. “If you _don’t_ help me, I can’t promise they won’t know exactly where you are within the hour. Maybe they won’t be able to touch you, but we _can_ track you, and we can wreak havoc with your top secret mission, whatever it is.”

Winnie let go of him, stepping back in disgust. This fucking idiot had no idea what he was dealing with. Her hand hovered at her back. It would be so easy to just draw her pistol and end this problem here and now. A sideways glance at her teammates showed both Alenko and Tali had adopted stances of readiness. They would back her up in this. But…would she really let this guy goad her into killing him? She took a few steadying breaths and shook her head slowly, glad when both Tali and Alenko relaxed. No, there had to be some other way to deal with this guy.

“Besides,” Finch added, straightening his shirt, “I know something you don’t know. About Beall. And I think it’s information you’re gonna want, Shepard.” The smirk was back. “You help me out with my problem, and maybe I can help you out with one you didn’t even know you had.”

Shit. This couldn’t be good. She bit back a sigh of frustration and took a step back, falling into a loose formation with her team. As casually as she could, she crossed her arms and leaned against the wall farthest from Finch.

“Start talking,” she said.

He told her all about his buddy Weisman, and how he’d been apprehended by the turians. It sounded like a pretty minor infraction to her. At the very least, she didn’t understand why Finch had sought _her_ out to try to fix it. Which, she suspected, meant he wasn’t telling her the whole truth. But she agreed to talk to the turian guard. If the Reds really were intent on getting Weisman out of turian custody, maybe she could help keep the collateral damage to a minimum. Finch seemed to see the decision in her eyes and he gave her a knowing smile. She wanted to punch it off his face, but she somehow managed to keep her calm. Damn, but it had been a long time since someone had pressed her buttons so easily. She suspected that once they did get back to the ship, she would need a good long run to clear her head and shake off this asshole’s greasy smiles. She’d been talking to him for what, five minutes? And already she never wanted to see him again.

“The turian’s right in there,” he gestured to the entry of Chora’s Den. “I’m sure a spectre should have no problem assuming custody of one measly human prisoner.” He brushed an invisible piece of lint from his shirt. “And just to show a little bit of good faith, I’ll give you half your payment up front.”

_Good faith, my ass_ , Winnie bit back. _You just want to hook me to make sure I get this done and come back for whatever help you think it is I need from you._ She raised her eyebrows impatiently and gestured for him to get on with it. The quicker she could be about this, the quicker she’d be done with Finch.

“There have been rumblings within the organization,” Finch said, his tone sly. “People thinking maybe they’d rather have Beall back on our side than rotting on some backwater prison moon.”

It was like a punch to the gut. If she hadn’t been leaning against the wall, she would have fallen over. She must have made some sort of sound, because Alenko had turned to her, eyes wide with concern, and he was already moving closer. She managed to stand up a little straighter and took a step away from the wall. Just one, but it was enough. Alenko halted and she saw him give a sharp nod from the corner of her eye.

“Why?” Winnie asked, her voice clear and firm. Once she started speaking, she found each word came out a little easier than the next. “He sold out everyone in the Reds he ever worked with. Why would they want him back?”

“Been some changes in management over the last few years,” Finch drawled. “Seems he’s managed to convince the new bosses that he never sold anyone out. Told them it was _you_ who’d hacked his files and gone to the cops, and that the only reason they put out the word that he was the one who turned was because you made some kind of deal with them.”

Winnie muttered a curse and Finch gave a careless shrug. It was close enough to what had happened to ring of truth for anyone who _wanted_ to believe. Beall might be capable of selling such a story, especially if the new leadership in the Reds hadn’t been too involved with the higher ups when it had all gone down. It would be all too easy to change just a few details and convince them that Beall had been just as much a victim as the Reds he’d ratted out. Shit. This wasn’t good at all. If Beall got out of prison, he _would_ come after her. That wouldn’t end well for anyone, and likely it would also get in the way of the important things. Like trying to save the galaxy from a geth invasion. Shit, shit, shit!

“But hey, you help me with my little problem with the turians, Shepard, and I make your problem with Beall go away. I can make sure he never makes it off that moon, yeah?”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Winnie snapped.

“You do that, sweetheart,” Finch purred. “I’ll be right here when you’re done.”

She glared at him and then turned on her heel. Alenko and Tali fell in behind her automatically. She could feel them both brimming over with questions, but thankfully they kept quiet. It was a short distance to the club entrance, and Winnie walked it slowly, trying to calm herself down before going inside. Beall. Fuck. How could this be happening now? She didn’t have time for this. It was a distraction she could _not_ afford. Yet here she was, planning to ask for the release of a piece of scum in order to prevent an even bigger distraction from popping up. She growled in frustration, drawing a surprised exclamation from Tali and another worried glance from Alenko. He gave her a hard look and then, seeming to make his mind up about something, drew a deep breath and stopped mid-stride.

“Commander.”

“Yes, Alenko?” Winnie stopped and turned to face him, trying to keep her frustration from her voice. This wasn’t his fault. Not one little bit. She would _not_ take this out on him, damn it.

“Look, clearly this situation is hitting you on a pretty personal level.” Winnie started to interject but he held up a hand, adding, “And it’s none of our business, so I’m not gonna ask for details.”

_Not right now, at least_ , Winnie thought, catching the curiosity burning behind his eyes. She sighed and nodded for him to continue.

“But I think before we help you with this, Tali and I both need to know,” he took another deep breath, “this Beall guy. Is keeping him in prison worth helping out the Reds? Worth risking an incident with the turians? Worth working with a, a…” he gestured a hand back in the direction of Finch, clearly searching for the right word to describe the creep.

“Bosh’tet?” Tali supplied helpfully.

“Sure,” Alenko said, blinking once or twice. He glanced at Tali in surprise and then shrugged, turning back to Winnie. “That works. Is it worth it, Commander?”

“Yes.”

Alenko gave her a long look, and she held his eyes. She could feel Tali assessing her as well, but she suspected the quarian would follow her lead in this without question. She seemed to be taking the whole situation more or less in stride. Alenko was the one who needed to be convinced. But whatever he saw in her face must have done it. After a long minute he nodded and sighed.

“All right, then.”

“Right,” Winnie agreed. “Let’s get this over with.”

It was painfully obvious from the start that, like it or not, the turian would not object to Winnie taking custody of Weisman. But he clearly _didn’t_ like it. A lot more than she would have expected if Weisman really had just been picked up with a little red sand. It didn’t take long for her to get the full story from the turian. Weisman’s “minor offense” had actually been tainting medical supplies meant for a turian colony. If he hadn’t been caught in the act, millions could have died. She felt sick to her stomach. Glancing helplessly at Tali and Alenko, she gave a little shake of her head and saw them both nod in relief. There was no way she could help set this guy free. But she knew the Reds wouldn’t give up, either.

“Look,” she said to the turian. “You should know that there are members of his gang on the station. They want him back, and I wouldn’t put it past them to try to stage a jailbreak.”

“Thanks, Shepard,” the turian said, sounding surprised. “I can double the security when we move him. I appreciate the heads up.”

“This guy deserves everything he’s got coming to him,” Winnie said.

She offered the turian her hand and he took it with (what she thought was) a bemused expression. They shook and she bid him farewell. Turning with her team to leave the club, she wondered what she was going to tell Finch. But as it turned out, she needn’t have worried. He had followed them into the club. It seemed he hadn’t been as confident in her ability to get Weisman out as he had claimed.

“I knew it!” He shouted, rushing at her. “You bitch! I should have known you couldn’t be trusted!”

“Whoa!” Alenko said, stepping between them and catching Finch.

Winnie blinked at the dangerous note in his voice. She’d never heard Alenko sound like that before. _And wow, this is so_ not _the time to be turned on by that._ Tali had her shotgun out and was aiming it at Finch. The turian they’d been speaking with had noticed the commotion and had come over to help as well, his weapon was also trained on the Red. Alenko had his hands full holding Finch back. Winnie drew her pistol and approached Finch cautiously.

“You lied to me, Finch,” she said calmly. “Did you really think I wouldn’t ask any questions? And since when do the Reds try to kill off alien colonies wholesale?”

“We’ve expanded since your day, Shepard. I thought the first human spectre might be willing to do her part to help humanity out, but it seems you’re just as much of a rat as you always were. Maybe it’s time the rest of the galaxy learned about your sordid past. I can make that happen, all it takes is one call.”

“You do what you have to do, Finch,” Winnie said through gritted teeth. “Whatever you may think, I was _never_ a fucking Red.” She spat at his feet. “People will believe what they want to believe. It’s not gonna stop me from doing my damn job.”

“Not to mention you’d be shooting yourself in the foot,” the turian snorted. Three heads and one helmet swiveled to look at him. He shrugged, and holstered his gun. “If you really think whatever you’re doing is furthering the cause of humanity, a galactic smear campaign against the first human spectre isn’t exactly going to make your race look good.”

Finch’s shoulders slumped and he scowled at the turian. He then directed the look to Alenko and pushed the soldier away, backing up and attempting to stare the rest of the group down.

“Fucking alien,” he muttered. Then, a nasty glint entered his eyes and he shot Winnie another one of those slimy smiles she had already come to despise. “You win this round, Shepard. But watch your back. I think an old acquaintance of yours is gonna be seeing the light of day, real soon. I’m sure he’s gonna wanna find you to catch up, don’t you think?”

With that, he spun on his heel and left the club. Winnie watched him go, a cold feeling of dread trickling down her spine. _Calm down, kiddo_ , she told herself. _You’ve got a little time here. He said they’ve just been_ thinking _about springing Beall. There’s no way they’re getting that bastard out today. You might still be able to stop this._ From the corner of her eye, she could see Kaidan staring after Finch with a frown on his face. She bit back a sigh. Shit. She didn’t think he was going to let this go without some answers. But, considering how he’d backed her up today despite his obvious reservations, she figured maybe he’d earned them. She had almost completely forgotten about the turian guard, and jumped a little when he spoke up.

“You’re just gonna let that guy get away with threatening you like that?” She couldn’t quite decipher his expression, but the disdain in his tone was clear. “You’re a spectre, Shepard, but that doesn’t mean people will keep respecting your authority if you let punks like that push you around.”

“What would you have had me do, then?” Winnie sighed. “Shoot him?”

“No one would have questioned it. Spectre,” he reminded her.

“That’s not how I do things,” Winnie said with a shake of her head. _No matter how much I might want to sometimes._

“Well. Your call, I guess. I’m sure the Council knew what it was doing.” This time his voice was full of doubt.

Winnie sighed again and thanked him for his help. He promised to keep an eye on Weisman and they parted ways. Tali and Kaidan followed her to the market, both lost in their own thoughts. They finished up their errands and then booked it back to the ship. Before they stepped into the airlock, Winnie drew a deep breath and stopped, turning around to face them.

“Thank you for your help with Finch,” she started. Her voice was quiet, calm. She could have been talking about a piece of mildly interesting code.

“Of course, Shepard,” Tali said, tilting her head slightly. Just a matter of course, she seemed to be saying. Despite herself, Winnie felt the urge to smile. She and Tali had hit it off immediately, and it seemed that her feelings of friendship for the quarian were reciprocated.

“Any time, ma’am.”

Alenko’s voice was carefully neutral, and she paused before speaking again to give him a considering look. He was staring just over her shoulder, not meeting her eyes. He had also fallen into parade rest, with his hands clasped behind his back. Not one hint of what he was actually thinking was being telegraphed. The purely professional attitude stung a little. They had been starting up a tentative friendship as well, she had thought. She was definitely going to have to have a talk with him to make sure that everything was good between them. Losing his respect on a personal level would suck, but if he had lost his faith in her as a commander? That could be deadly.

“Given that this was, in fact, a personal matter,” she finally went on, “I would greatly appreciate it if you didn’t mention this to anyone else on the crew.”

“Of course,” Tali repeated warmly.

Alenko hesitated.

“Lieutenant?”

“I’m sorry, Commander. Of course, I won’t say anything about it, if that’s what you want. But…”

“But?”

“If the Reds actually do manage to bust this Beall out of prison, and he comes after you—shouldn’t we let the crew know about the danger? We can’t watch your back if we’re not aware of the threat.”

Winnie blinked. Well. Alenko had dropped the blank face, and concern showed clearly in his eyes. Nice, warm, brown eyes. She did like brown eyes. _Not the time, Shep._ She corralled her thoughts and offered him a reassuring smile. Maybe things weren’t as badly fucked up as she’d feared.

“I’m sure the Reds will _try_ to break him out, Lieutenant. But Finch should never have told me they were thinking about it. I still have a card or two up my sleeve. I’m not that worried about it.” _Well, not enough to let it show, at any rate._ “And now I can make sure that if, by some miracle, he does get out, I will be the first to hear about it. I promise, if that happens, I will let you and the rest of the crew know.”

“Thank you, ma’am.” He gave a sharp nod, relief clear in his stance.

That ended the impromptu, and unofficial, debriefing, and they finally made their way into the ship. Tali and Alenko continued on to their lockers while Winnie paused in the cockpit to check in with Joker. He told her they were still waiting for Garrus and Liara to return, but that they had radioed to say they were headed back. Winnie told him to begin plotting a course for Noveria and to let her know once everyone was back aboard and the last of the supplies had been delivered. With luck, they could be in on their way within the hour. She let him get on with it and headed for her quarters. She had a letter to write before they left Citadel space.

~*~

> _To: Commander W. Shepard; SSV Normandy_
> 
> _From: Detective P. Carroski; Boston, MA, Earth_
> 
> _____
> 
> _Shep,_
> 
> _I remember Finch. Tried for years to put that pissant away, but he was a slippery one. I’m sorry you had the bad luck to run into him out on the Citadel. The Reds have really been expanding into nasty business lately. All this “pro-human” crap. We’ve had people from C-Sec in a couple of times for primers on the group, they’ve expanded that far. For what it’s worth, I think you did the right thing in regards to Weisman. Although, you already know that, or you wouldn’t have done it. Thanks for the heads up about Beall. I can’t imagine how he managed to convince anyone he didn’t turn on the organization, but I’ll make sure they don’t get to act on any desire to have him rejoin the ranks. Don’t worry about it. Seriously, I mean it. Don’t worry. Sounds like you’ve got bigger fish to fry as it is. Beall’s not worth any space in that amazing brain of yours._
> 
> _Congratulations, by the way. I’m only sorry you and Anderson didn’t get the chance to fly together. I know you were both looking forward to that. Somehow, I suspect he’d much rather be out chasing the bad guys with you than whatever he’s getting up to on the Citadel. Anna sends her love, and wants me to remind you that you had better plan to have dinner with us the next time you’re in town. I don’t think she believes me that you’re not coming back to Earth unless you’re dragged here. But still, the invitation’s open, hey?_
> 
> _Take care of yourself out there, and kick some ass._
> 
> _—Carroski_
> 
> _(Seriously, I mean it. Don’t worry about Beall. I’ll take care of it.)_

Winnie smiled as she read the letter through a second time. It had been waiting when she’d gotten back from the showers (after a very long and very much needed run on the treadmill). Carroski was running the Boston police, these days, and he had contacts all over Earth, not to mention the prison moon where Beall had been sentenced. If anyone could make sure he stayed behind bars, it was Carroski. It was out of her hands now, and she felt lighter for knowing that. Carroski had been right enough about that, she had more important things to worry about.

Starting with food. She had barely eaten all day, and after everything that had happened, she thought she had best try to get at least one good meal in her before they made it to Noveria. Checking her omni-tool, she saw that they were still several hours out, yet. Good. That gave her time to eat and hopefully catch a little bit of shut-eye before everything kicked into high gear. It was the middle of the night cycle, and most of the crew would be asleep or at stations, so she didn’t bother putting her hair up in its customary bun before exiting her quarters. Instead, she pulled the wet strands back into a loose braid to keep it out of her face as she made a beeline for the mess.

She was a little surprised to find that the mess wasn’t deserted. Alenko was sitting at the table, empty plate and full coffee cup in front of him. He was staring off into space, fingers tapping a rhythmless beat on his mug. She glanced around and gave a small sigh when she saw that they were alone. Normally, that would be a great thing. She wasn’t deep enough in denial to pretend she didn’t relish the chance to talk one-on-one with the lieutenant uninterrupted. This time, however, it just meant that she had no excuse not to answer the questions he was sure to have. Still, she had been planning on taking him down to Noveria with her. Better to address any lingering doubts before they were on a mission, she figured. Bracing herself, she walked the rest of the way from her cabin to the mess.

“Alenko,” she said softly, giving him a small nod as she passed him on her way to the food storage.

“Shepard,” he replied, nodding in turn.

_Oh, it’s Shepard now, is it? Not Commander or ma’am. Interesting._

His eyes focused on her and he watched silently as she assembled her own plate and started some hot water for tea. What was available on the ship wasn’t nearly as good as what she preferred, but it was better than nothing. One of these days, she was going to remember to stock up on the good stuff during a supply run. Somehow, it always managed to slip her mind until after the ship had taken off again. Once she had her meal in order, she moved to the table and took the seat opposite him. He sat back in the seat, content to sip his coffee as she tucked into her food. After she’d finished eating and he’d fetched a refill on his coffee, she pushed her plate away and picked up her tea, taking a tentative sip. Finding it the perfect temperature, she took another, longer sip and then sat back in her seat as well. Taking it for the invitation it was, Alenko set down his cup and leaned forward.

“I was worried about you down there, Shepard.”

“Worried about me?” she asked, one eyebrow arching. “Or about what I might have done?”

“About you,” he said firmly, with no hesitation. “We’ve been working together for weeks, in some pretty intense situations, and I’ve _never_ seen you that shaken. It wasn’t just that you weren’t expecting a run-in like that. We’ve had plenty of unexpected stuff come at us lately, I know you can deal with that. But as soon as Finch mentioned this Beall…” He shook his head slowly and then met her eyes. “It was like everything you’d ever thought was true had been turned inside out and upside down.”

Winnie resisted the urge to pull her eyes away. He would have to zero in on Beall, wouldn’t he? She had expected him to want to know the extent of her involvement with the Reds, or Finch’s claim that she had been a criminal. But instead he’d seen right into the heart of the matter. Into the one aspect of this situation that had truly thrown her off balance. After a moment, Alenko—no, Kaidan. If she was going to tell him this, there was a wall coming down between them whether she wanted it to or not—dropped his gaze back to his cup. Winnie sighed and leaned in, keeping her voice low.

“My parents weren’t exactly upstanding citizens,” she began. He looked up again, tilting his head in interest. “Small time stuff, a lot of hacking, nothing that ever got anyone hurt. My mom was amazing with computers,” she said, allowing herself a small smile. “Which is where I get it from, I suppose. They died, though, when I was just a kid. Beall was their best friend, their partner in crime, and he took me in. Raised me.”

“And he was a member of the Reds?”

“Yeah,” Winnie took a long sip of her tea, closing her eyes to savor it. Subpar tea was still tea, after all. She opened her eyes again, holding Kaidan’s gaze. “He’s also the man who had my parents killed.”

Kaidan’s eyes widened at this, but he didn’t say anything.

“My parents wanted to keep me out of their line of work, I think,” Winnie pushed on. “But Beall had no such compulsions. As soon as he realized I had Mom’s talent for hacking, he insisted I start earning my keep. It wasn’t so bad, for the most part. I was still able to go to school, have a mostly normal life. Nobody ever got hurt by what I did, so far as I ever knew. Better than ending up on the streets, I used to tell myself, with no choice but to join up with a gang.”

“But if Beall was a Red—?”

“I didn’t know,” she explained. “Neither did my folks, at least, not until right before they died.”

“You think that’s why he had them killed?” At Winnie’s nod, he frowned in thought. “So how did _you_ find out then?”

“I wanted out,” she told him. “Just before I turned eighteen, I thought I would try hacking into his files, look to see if there was anything I could use for leverage. I knew he’d never just let me walk away from the work, I was too useful to him. He really should have known better than to keep that kind of information where I could get at it,” she said with a shake of her head. “But when I realized that he was a Red, and that by extension, he’d had _me_ doing dirty work for them, and then I realized he’d been behind my parents’ deaths. Well. Going to the cops with all of his files was a pretty easy decision.”

“So they arrested him and he flipped on the Reds,” Kaidan mused, reaching the logical conclusion. “And you got out and joined up?”

“With immunity and a clean record for my cooperation,” she agreed. “The chance to make a fresh start. Which is exactly what I did.”

“Hard to imagine the Hero of the Blitz as a criminal,” Kaidan said after a moment. Winnie could see the corners of his lips quirking slightly. “But, having seen how damn near impossible it is to keep you out of a system you want into, can I just say I’m glad you decided to use your powers for good?”

“That’s almost exactly what Carroski said when I told him I wanted to join the Alliance,” Winnie laughed.

“Carroski?”

“The cop I went to when I turned Beall in,” she explained. “He’d been after the bastard for years. I knew he’d jump at the opportunity to put him away for good.” She smiled fondly. “But he surprised me a bit. Turned out to be a good guy, not just a useful tool. We’ve kept in touch. He was in the Alliance himself. Served with Anderson, actually.”

“He’s the card up your sleeve, I take it?”

“Mmhmm,” she agreed. “I wrote him before we left the Citadel. He’ll make sure Beall stays put.”

“Good.” Kaidan said.

The force behind the word was enough to make Winnie blink. She tilted her head, looking him over.

“You’ve surprised me too, Kaidan,” she said quietly. His eyebrows shot up in question and she smiled. “I guess the way you reacted when Finch mentioned the Reds, I was worried you might not want to work with me.”

A frown creased his face.

“Believe me, Shepard. I’m the last person to hold anything someone did as a kid over them. We’ve all got things in our past we wish—well, you know. As far as I’m concerned, your record speaks for itself. I’ve seen you in action enough to have a sense of who you are now.”

“Oh? And who is that?”

“An Alliance soldier,” he answered, “and a damned fine one. Not to mention, a truly gifted leader. It is an honor to serve with you, commander.”

“I, ah, thank you, lieutenant.”

There didn’t really seem to be much to say after that, so Winnie finished her tea and excused herself, ordering Kaidan to get some shut eye as well. She was grateful that he didn’t seem inclined to hold her past against her. But as she climbed into bed, she paused, thinking about something else he’d said. He was the last person to hold a person’s past against them, eh? She pondered that as she settled under the covers. Nothing in his file indicated that he was anything other than a model soldier. He’d been even more on the straight and narrow than she had, in fact. But the file didn’t tell her anything about his life before he’d joined up, did it? She couldn’t help but wonder what skeletons Kaidan had in his own closet. _Well_ , she reflected, _the door’s been opened now. He knows one of my big secrets. Maybe one day he’ll trust me enough to tell me some of his, too._

**Author's Note:**

> While this series is, ultimately, a Shega story, they both had their own lives in between their first meeting and the time when ME3 gets underway. Winnie's other "big romance" was, as I'm sure you've guessed, Kaidan. So now we are getting to the part of the story where that is explored. Her relationship with Kaidan is going to play a big part in the rest of the story, so I do want to show at least a glimpse into how it got going.


End file.
